When last did I do this, I mean actually post on this blog? It is kind of hazy and fuzzy, but I think it was after Arsenal won the FA Cup. When you consider that after that trophy, the Gunners have gone and won another trophy, and my tummy has grown a few centimetres forward again, you will understand it has been a while. However, you cannot really gauge by that protruding tummy reference because my tummy has this uncanny ability to keep growing bigger irrespective of everything I do to arrest the protrusion – Beer (No), Eat after 6pm (No), Eat once a day (Yes), Sit-ups every morning (Yes), yet tummy keeps protruding. I think I might have to accept it as a sign because a Yoruba Sage called K1 the Ultimate (I think that is what he is still known as because Fuji musicians have this confusing habit of changing their names every time they take time out of the hard work of praising themselves at every paid shows to release an album) advised that “only big-bellied people should be trusted with money”, probably it is a sign that God is about to trust me with plenty money, you know that kind of money that gives wings to dreams, because at the moment, the money I have is the one that decapitates nightmares so it can stay forever.
You know I try as much as possible not to depress you when you come here, I am sure you get that opportunity from many places elsewhere, but it is always difficult because this is Nigeria and we are Nigerians, one good news is always escorted by terrible news like that 16-year-old weightlifter who became an overnight hero with a Commonwealth Gold, but by the morning after became a villain testing positive to a PED, not once but twice. This is Nigeria! The over 200 Girls are yet to be brought back, actually, about 100 boys have been kidnapped after. The Ebola Virus has sashayed into the country and it is happily dancing across the nation; and the Federal Government has chosen this opportune moment to sack all Resident Doctors in all Federal Health Institutions across the country. In fairness to the FG, the Resident Doctors have been residing in their respective homes for some time now, the FG only chose to help them officially ratify the decision to stay at home indefinitely, and that is a no-brainer, isn’t it? Well, Club Football is back and it provides a sort of escapism from the drudgery of my daily life as a Nigerian because how else do you describe my obsession with millionaires who complain when they are not given cakes on their birthday or when someone is trying to pay them a paltry £100,000 per week for chasing a round leather around competitively twice a week.
Thankfully, what is a worthwhile form of escapism is the fact that myself and a few other like-minded pals have decided to form a Book Club which we have impeccably named “Vibrant Minds” through which we can read, share ideas and develop our minds. If you love books like us, you are welcome to join the fold. In the same vein, my very close friend, Debayo Coker of the #Pausiblity fame is working on a compilation of short stories and yours truly has been commissioned (I kid, all the proceeds are going to charity) to contribute. In addition, I have been a regular contributor to Suraj Oyewale’s JarusHub, a career and mentorship website. I have shared all these information so that in case I go AWOL again, do not assume it is laziness or procrastination (still battling this though), just believe I have my hands full working to develop my mind, do something good for the less-privileged, and mentor some younger ones; all these while working full-time with an Indian company currently being led by a crop of ex-Nigerian Bottling Company Managers, guys, you have to give it to me, I dey try.